Saturday, June 28, 2008
What can I say at this point, way too many thoughts in my mind to compress in some paragraphs but I'll do my best to bleed it slowly but definitely not all at once. Next week I'll be turning 40; most men probably find themselves at this point trying to come to grips with the reality of getting old. The big 40 its a bench mark, if you played it right the big 40 is a pinnacle. I did for the most part. I heard a quote many years ago while listening to a Silvio Rodriguez record; finding these words so profound and inspiring I later used this same quote to start a song on my own record back in 2001 while releasing OriXa's/2012 Elegua Digital.
"There are men that fight one day and are good; there are some men that fight one year and are better but there are those men that fight all their lives. Those are indispensable men"
Turning 40 for me is giving me that sentiment; I'm going to fight for the rest of my life. Surviving the tale from my current situation so I can write the next chapter and share it with the future will be one of many.
I'm facing other issues at my 40's; most importantly I'm not worry about how old I'm getting but rather how much more time I'm going to be given to tap the wealth of life and actually get old. Yes man one of the things I've been thinking lately is how I'm looking forward to that; getting old. To get old with the woman I have come to love more than ever because through it all she's shown me we were meant to mate for life. To see my daughter grow and attack her own life the way I have attacked mine in pursuit of adventure and love. To see her find her passions and exploit them. To cherish every moment and to hold my family on the highest pedestal.
I have now officially learned that I will be listed for lung transplant. This has been a big accomplishment not withstanding what still lays ahead, the hills to come are going to be steep and not easy to climb but my fighting spirit is ready and I will strategically knock them one by one. Please check out all the information regarding my donation fund and do your best to get involved and spread the word among your own circles of friends to reach out. Visit the JimeneZ site at my space for some ear candy and keep rooting for me as I enter the octagon of the UFCFL(Ultimate Fighting Championships for Life). I won't let you down; I've been training for this all my life!!
Love and Peace, Rowan
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Hay Beautiful People,
I want to begin this blog with some thoughts and a epiphany. We are all in death row; yes we are all going to die some day.
We can not control when we land and when we at times suddenly have to go but we do have some kind of control over the choices we make in between. I have been given a second chance while in death row. I was in my boxed life and my sentence was delivered. For a moment execution time kept lurking by a near corner and unexpectedly I had an appeal to regain another chance at the fabulous opportunity to be alive. Being alive is such a complex endeavor but being dead, how complicated can that be? I have been confronting my own mortality for several months now and I started to laugh. Yes for as morbid as it sounds I was laughing and that laughter resonated so hard that's when I realize; I've been playing my own life world cup and the ice breaker pass had been thrown at me to kick the ultimate goal and win seconds shy to ending the first half.
Even though I have always played hard this epiphany has made me realize so many things. There's so much I want to do, so many people I like to reach; having the opportunity to go at it for a second half I will make sure to play with much more devotion and freedom, with much love and passion. Is with this note I want to acknowledge all my friends and family, all my team mates and partners in crime for keeping the faith and cheering me for what's to come in my second go.
By next week I will officially be listed to receive a lung transplant at UCSF; I will be meeting with the medical team, transplant coordinator and the financial office to get all the paper work necessary to close the deal. Again there's yet much more work ahead. Waiting can take anything from 3 to 6 months. There's has been cases when this takes only weeks(I would love for that to be my case so keep your fingers crossed) but I need to be realistic and stay focus. My goal is to maintain, maintain, maintain my physical shape and stay mentally on line.
Soon I will be sending some e-mails to all my network as I also will began preparation for fund rising and creating an account where all donations will go for the purposes of enabling me to cope with the cost of the whole process. More details on this subject to come. In the meantime keep the love high, hold fast as we're going for a ride.
"Hasta la Victoria Siempre" Che
PS: "Hold Fast; Here We Go" Rowan playing hard in Fontainbleu-France 2002
picture by Randy Puro
Friday, June 13, 2008
Hello Dear Friends,
I hope all is well with you out there; for some of you in the Bay Area I hope you had a chance to enjoy the beautiful weather in the past week. I really wish I could get my butt to the beach but it would require quite a bit of work however; I've been able to enjoy it in different ways, stepping into the garden and chilling out in a hammock and yes I had a couple of Mojitos and a few beers. At least for now I can still enjoy a bit of those vices as it all may change after surgery. Here's my latest findings.
You'll be glad to find out as much as I was that my heart is strong as bull; even thou my right side has enlarge a little due to the pulmonary hypertension created by the condition the doctors found no reason to prescribe any medication and lifted the the flag on my cardiovascular condition as to be of no problem while under going lung transplant surgery.
Everything else is also OK as per all my results have shown the rest of my body is doing well. My GI track still may need some work however; they may do this after surgery if need be as there is the possibility that medication can help the reflux. I have lost another 6 to 7 Lbs due to the way my body burn calories but I'm planing to attack this by stuffing myself more with protein shakes between meals and just eating like there's no tomorrow, I'm still working and very mobile so it is not an alarming situation as is all part of what my body is going through; I just don't want to let it go because I need to be as strong as possible before surgery. So to all my chef friends come on over and cook me a meal whenever you want!!!
I had the chance to met Dr. hoops the pulmonary surgeon yesterday; it was brief but nice. We did not talk much as it was kind of a drive by introduction while crossing paths in the clinic's hallway and we did not have an official appointment to met. The transplant team will be meting in 2 weeks to finally go through all my results and discuss the final details before putting me on the list. I have to be honest I can't help but feel impatience at times but considering the amount of time it has taking me to get to this point it has not been long and everything has so far gone in the right direction; patience is a virtue and I have to be humble about this opportunity.
You have to understand something here; for a dude like me that is so hungry for life chewing my days and hours under this sluggish period can be agonizing at times. I have to say I'm learning a whole a lot about appreciation and the true value of what at any given moment we have while we here. I love my family more than ever and I'm so privilege to have them. True friendships harvest the fruitful values for what they were planted and love shows up in you doorstep in many forms. I'll keep moving forward and I hope you follow me all the way as I look forward to celebrate life with you all.
Peace and Love, Rowan