Incredible!!

Dear love ones,

I hope you understand; I'm still putting everything in perspective and letting all that just has happen settle in my head. I will let you in pretty soon so hang in there. For one thing the thought of being able to joying my family with my new physical state its so exiting I won't lie and selfishly so its the first thing in my mind and the first thing I want to do. I can't wait to see Kaya and for her to see that papa is not using oxygen anymore; her words on my episode one video stuck with me through out the entire process and hyper fueled my willingness to stay strong and to put on my full metal jacket everyday. I have missed her so much and of course to be able to salsa dance with my beautiful wife Heather again; something she loves so much and that now I'll make sure we do every day.

The next year is going to be critical for my full recovery. Theres a lot ahead but I'm prepare for the task and I'll have my brother Juan as my care giver living with me for the next 6 weeks; I'm so exited for this as he has been such a rock as well and of course all of you whom constantly keep me on your minds and when the moment came blasted the positive wave of energy that carried me through........please don't stop I'll need to surf in it for a while!

OK I'm being release today and I will have a plan for seeing people soon, please e-mail me at rjstonefly@yahoo.com and will give you an update on a blast. I won the belt on this fight and now as a good champ I need to defend my right to keep it. Bring it on!

Breathing deeper everyday.

One love, Rowan

The Breath of Life Flows through Me!

Dear Love Ones,

I'll be brief but I won't lie I have so much to say...... all I really want to say right now is that it has been a remarkable experience; although my battle its not over yet I have pass through its power crux. Thank you for helping me built the base of such of monumental road. I had a chance to lightly brisk through all your e-mails and I'm so happy to have just a circle of people that care...it took my breath away; but guest what ? It took a second for it to come back!

Much Love from the UCSF Hospital,

Once again, the Rowan you've always known!

One Breath at the time!

Dear lovely people!

Well its been awhile since I posted some notes; I hope you have enjoyed the videos. My friend Josiah has done the Episode series and Chris "The Block" Bloch did the climbing; I'm so thankful for everything that has happened in the past few weeks. It seems like everything is falling into place and I'm getting closer every breath I take.

Its been 6 and half weeks since I've been on the waiting list and about 5 weeks since I've been homebound. I have been working from home and just staying put for the most part; as you've seen in the videos I've been trying to stay busy and physically strong as well as doing a bit of art for the zazzle store.

At the moment I'm not looking as much as the stud I used to be...but let's just say that given the circumstances being able to stand on my 2 feet is quite a great accomplishment; notwithstanding I'm still making my meals, taking showers, etc all in a kind of slow motion but efficiently.

My dear friend Bruce Cornell a special sponsored athlete from MHW, the company I work for, dropped one of his fancy wheelchairs for me this week. Now let me explain; I'm still able to walk and move around but long distances are definitely a big task so having someone pushing me around if I need to or want to go out is the way to go; I can actually enjoy myself more rather than getting all worked out trying to catch my breath. I had the chance to go out twice this week. These were by no means leisure outings - on Monday, courtesy of Mr. Bloch, I went to get some blood drawn for the Inmunogenetics lab for UCSF, this is for tissue matching...and yesterday, courtesy of my brother Juan, I went to get a bone density scan which is also part of my exams for lung transplant. In all it was great to be out although this didn't go without great physical effort. I have to say that while its been hard adjusting myself to living in this condition I don't complain; I feel it's a waste of time and I'd rather focus on affirmations towards my goal; it was hella fun to be out.



A few days back Heather called my transplant coordinator to check in and jokingly mentioned that we were going to start checking into E-bay for some lungs....she laughed and said don't do that yet. She mentioned that they were getting busy and that a few transplants had been done in the past 2 weeks and that probably I was very close. Again there are a few factors such as size, blood match and quality so.....but I won't deny I'm hoping it comes soon!!!

Anyhow please stay in touch, buy some shirts for the holidays and let friends know how cool they are...and come to the climbing comp/party Nov. 1 at Ironworks in Berkeley. Much love to everyone out there.

Peace, Rowan

Flying With Rowan - Episode 2 by Josiah

Rowan on Climbing with Scleroderma by Chris Bloch

Video Documentary - Episode 1

I'm still Juiced!!!

Hi Beautiful People,

I keep meeting people through the internet; via my blog , facebook and just people I have come across while surfing the net (one of the time killer things I do on the daily). It's really amazing; the stories of some of these people are very invigorating and really inspiring however; at the same time I have come across some pretty sad stories. This situation has at times bring me to the edge of both spectrums and at times takes me to the "what If's".

I won't lie to you; I have some days where experiencing despair is inevitable; I mean no matter how much positive energy I try to focus on and try to generate for my actual reality I do end up coming across the entrance of what I call the black tunnel. This is why I keep a flash light in my hand; that is my spirit. Somehow this brings me back to a safe place a serenity space where I can call all the shots and view my choices. I'm choosing to fight and to stay alive; I'm determined to stay focused and to visualize my future. I'm a husband, a father an artist a climber but most importantly I've always been a dreamer.

I believe that dreams come true when you are focused and invested in your life on making them happen. I'm fully invested, I'm focused and I believe. I feel for some of the sad stories I've read and I'm glad that they bring perspective to my own story not withstanding I guess we are lucky in our very own way. I'm lucky to be here right now and I'm lucky to have the oportunity to regain my life though this experience. I will continue to stay on the same page, taking one day at the time, one breath at a time and one smile at a time.